I was watching Degrassi: The Next Generation and it actually scared me. This one girl had what seemed like a pretty normal and happy life, but she started taking pictures of herself. She posted these pictures on the internet and this one guy messaged her telling her that she was beautiful. These pictures weren't nudes or anything, but they were pushing the envelope. (Eg. School girl uniform, unbuttoned blouse, etc...) Anyways, she thought nothing of it and then out of nowhere this guy tracks her down and starts telling her how he loves her, etc... He's extremly obsessive and creepy that the girl's little sister has to call the cops. The reason it scared me was because I could relate to it. Whenever I watch things like that or read books about a girl and her internet life, it just gives me the chills. I've always had horrible confidence so I've turned to the internet. I've posted pictures which I probably shouldn't have posted just to have guys tell me that I'm beautiful... It's actually makes me physically sick each time I reflect back on it. Then on the show, the girl's boyfriend said "These guys aren't just looking at your pictures" and it made me cringe. It's horrible what I'm doing, but sometimes it feels like an addiction. I need that validation, anyways. I'm done. Done with this entry. I can't say that I'm done with the pictures just because I'm not going to lie. If I can stop I will, but then again I don't know if it's possible.
Later Days.
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